How To Reinvent Yourself: Become the Best Version of You
First of all, I’m going to make a quick assumption. I’m assuming because you’ve clicked on this post you’re currently feeling in a bit of a lull and you’re wanting to become the best version of you – a feminine and elegant woman living a luxurious lifestyle.
But if you’re struggling to lose weight, not achieving the goals you’ve set yourself, and feeling as though you were destined for better things but they don’t seem to be coming…
The answer might be that you need to reinvent yourself.
We’ve all felt like we’re in a lull, that life is just standing still and you’re just not where you want to be, and it can feel so demotivating.
You see all the other fabulous women on Instagram and in real life who seem to have their lives together and you can’t help but wish it was you.
Even though we know a lot can be staged on IG and what things look like on the outside aren’t always the truth, but still, I know exactly how you feel.
I also used to (and still do at times) lust after a luxurious lifestyle, living on my own terms and being the most elegant, feminine and classy version of myself.
However, this has not always been the case. In the past few years I have made many attempts to reinvent myself and become the woman I wanted to be and live my dream life. But it wasn’t until mid-2020 when a sudden change in circumstances forced me to re-evaluate where I currently was (broke and unemployed) and where I wanted to be (being the best version of myself and living life on my own terms).
Being placed in a position where I had no option but to stop dreaming and start taking action really was the kick I needed!
You know the saying, “what got you here, won’t get you there”? Well that hit me, hard.
It was a true lightbulb moment or a wake up call.
The person I was and had developed into at that point in my life wasn’t going to achieve all the things I now wanted to.
From that moment, I became really serious about creating and living the life I had always dreamed of.
I needed to change my identity and reinvent myself into the woman who was softer, more elegant, had her dream job and wardrobe etc etc.
If you’re in a similar position, reinventing yourself might help you to elevate your everyday, achieve your goals and life your dream life.
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What Does It Mean to Reinvent Yourself?
To reinvent means to take something new from something that already exists. Essentially, you’re accepting your current self but evolving into something better.
If your life seems unaligned with your goals, values and beliefs, you need to take some time to reassess and reinvent yourself to become the person who has achieved those goals and acts whole heartedly in line with the new beliefs you have.
For example, if you’re someone who is struggling to lose weight (like I did for so long), you’re identity is likely to be someone who struggles with their weight and needs to shed some extra pounds. So unless you change your identity, you’ll always have those extra pounds to lose.
However, if you were a slim woman, you wouldn’t be watching every calorie you ate or trying a new fad diet every month. Instead, you’d eat healthily, exercise often and know when to stop eating before you’ve overindulged and entered into a food coma.
How Long Does It Take to Reinvent Yourself?
To fully reinvent yourself can take months or years. However, deciding you want to change or reinvent yourself can take minutes!
Reinventing yourself does take time and effort, but like with any new habit or lifestyle change, it can take 30 days for the habit to feel natural and 90 days for it to become a permanent lifestyle change.
Of course, this all depends on what your goals are and what your baseline is.
If you’re looking to reinvent yourself into an elegant and feminine woman, but previously you’ve tended to be more masculine, it might take you longer than someone who, for example, is already girly, but not refined in the way they dress.
How Do I Start to Reinvent Myself?
You can start to reinvent yourself right now! It starts with your mindset and ends with your habits, routines and environment.
Below, I’ve outlined the 5 steps I took to reinvent myself to become the best version of me (a slim, elegant woman, living her best life).
1. Forgive Yourself and Move On
The first step to reinventing yourself is to acknowledge who you used to be and allow yourself to be someone new. There’s no point being down with yourself at how you got to the point in your life where you are now.
I’d bet you had to evolve into this person now to get through your past life experiences, but if you believe the past isn’t the same path as your future, you’ll need to shed this version of you so you can make room for the new you. This might mean you want to change everything about yourself (I know I did), and that’s perfectly ok!
This was something I journaled through. I forgave myself for being the woman with the hard exterior because past experiences meant I had to be strong. I forgave myself for all the times I gave in to temptation and binge ate followed by a month of restricting all food and counting every calorie.
Other posts relating to journaling:
- Journal Prompts: What They Are and How to Use Them
- Journal Prompts for Self-Discovery
- Journal Prompts for Self-Love
2. Define Your New Life
What would your new and improved life look like? How will you know you’re living your dream life?
To completely reinvent yourself it’ll take more than just surface level changes. To become her you’ll need to look, act and sound like her.
In your journal, describe in as much detail as you can, how your new life will look. My easy go-to starting question is “if I were living my best life, what would it look like?” I then answered this question in relation to so many areas in my life including:
- Daily routines
- Career / business
- Family and personal life
- Relationships with friends, colleagues etc
- Spiritually
- Finances
- Your physical appearance
- Your personality traits
- Health and fitness
- Hobbies and past times (this can even include what TV shows you watch, music you listen to and who you follow on social media)
- And anything else you can think of!
As an example, in your most ideal life, you have a career which offers you flexibility in hours and location but is challenging and creative. Or, you always have at least 3 month’s salary in savings.
I also found it helpful to keep my journal close by over a couple of days so whenever I thought of something I could quickly add it to my description.
You’ll be surprised by how much you can miss, even if you spend an hour on just this exercise alone. So, please don’t feel the need to rush just for the sake of completion.
3. Bring Your New Life into Existence
The most effective way I brought changes into my life was through vision boards and affirmations.
Now, I know everyone does vision boards differently. Creating a private Pinterest board with all my goals and dreams pinned to it was better for me than to cut out images from magazines and piece them together or create a collage in Canva and save ir as my phone background. But each to their own.
My vision board is filled with my goals, inspirational quotes and images of the type of clothes, makeup and hairstyles the new me would wear.
The second part for how I brought my new life into existence was that I wrote out affirmations every morning in my journal. My affirmations are in the present tense as if I’ve already achieved that goal or standard of life.
I’ve heard a few times that the brain can’t distinguish between what’s real and what isn’t. I didn’t believe this at first, but have you ever had one of those dreams where you wake up and think “omg did that actually happen“? Well it’s a similar concept, by reading and writing out my affirmations each morning in the present tense trains my brain to think they’re true whether I’m close or not.
An example of an affirmation relating to your new life might be:
I am so happy now I’m living my dream life. I am elegant, classy and feminine and this shows through my style and personality.
Bonus tip: I’ve also created a new larger widget on my iPhone background through the ‘reminders’ app and this has 3 affirmations written on it. so every time I unlock my phone I can read my affirmations and reinforce to myself what I want to achieve.
4. Take Action
To begin to create your new life, think about what you might want to keep.
I know that sounds counter-productive. You want to reinvent yourself not stay the same, but I’d be willing to bet there’s at least one thing you’d be happy to keep, or at least use as an anchor to build upon for your new life.
This could be as simple as you want to implement a morning and evening skincare routine, but before you’ve been a bit hit and miss. Well, your new skincare habit might start as soon as you’ve brushed your teeth. Brushing your teeth is the trigger for you to complete your morning or evening skincare routine.
James Clear, who wrote Atomic Habits, best describes building on existing habits to create new ones so you can live a better life. I’d highly recommend reading his book if you haven’t already. You can even get the Kindle book or the audible version – whichever suits your lifestyle!
When I reinvented myself into a more refined, elegant and feminine woman, I didn’t just stop at creating new habits, I changed my whole environment. I purged my wardrobe of all the clothes and shoes that new me wouldn’t wear. I deleted old playlists from my music library and replaced them with jazz and classical music.
Anyway, to begin to take action, write down everything you currently do which you’d want to keep doing (albeit you might want to change a few things, for example, which skincare products you use as per the above example). Then write another list of all the habits or things she would do.
This might be something major like “run marathons for your chosen charity” or something smaller like “go on a 15 minute walk every lunch break”.
Try not to feel discouraged if this is a longer list than you had initially thought. Be positive that you now have a super clear idea of the steps you need to take to achieve your dream life.
5. Schedule in One Thing Today!
Now you’ve defined what your most ideal life would look like and what habits you currently have and would need to implement to become her, the next step is to take action and start living like the best version of yourself.
From your life description and habit lists what is one thing you can do today to bring yourself closer to the new you? Perhaps you go out and buy a healthy food shop, listen to a motivational book or podcast on your lunchtime walk or complete your skincare routine before bed.
Just don’t waste time, you’re more likely to achieve your goals and become the new and best version of yourself if you don’t think too hard about it, at first, and just act.
Next, what other adjustments or changes can you make to your daily routine to achieve your goal of becoming the new and reinvented version of you?
Don’t feel as though you need to rush through your lists and implement everything straight away. You could choose a few habits or goals to work towards and once they’re second nature or have been completed you move onto the next thing.
A word of warning, linking back to what I said above, it takes 30 days for a new habit to feel natural and 90 days for it be a lifestyle change. So you will slip up at one point or another, but keep moving and don’t be too hard on yourself.
4 Bonus Quick Tips to Reinvent Yourself
1. If you feel you need to, distance yourself from certain people while you level up and reinvent yourself. Don’t feel bad for doing this and you don’t need to announce it. Just decline a couple of invites out or take your time to reply to text messages.
2. Ask yourself “what would she do” or “what would the most elegant, classic and refined version of me do?” For me, this takes the pressure away from what I might want to do and empowers me to chose to act in line with the best version of myself. For example, I would love nothing more than to eat 2 bags of crisps every afternoon, but the best version of me loves to fuel her body with nourishing and healthy foods so she would have a fruit salad as her afternoon snack.
3. Find new friends who are similar to the person you want to become and do as they do. Eat at the restaurants they would go to, join a club or start a hobby that they would do each week.
4. Allow yourself to be on the journey and enjoy the process. Be happy even on just day one of your journey where you’ve only done 1 thing towards living your new and best life. At the end of it all, if you don’t like yourself now, you won’t magically like yourself 10lbs lighter!
Final thoughts
If you’re serious about wanting to bring about changes to your life, follow the above 5 steps to reinvent yourself to become the best version of you.
Any type of change will take time before it becomes second nature so allow yourself to enjoy the process and figuring out how your new routines and habits will work for you.
Hopefully, now you’re much more clearer on how you can reinvent yourself to become an elegant and feminine woman living a luxurious lifestyle and I wish you luck in becoming her!
